13.10.06

Here I sit on Black Friday, cowering in an office trying to not be noticed by the Witches Coven I work around. They continue to try and call themselves nurses but I remember the trials of Salem and recognise the evil art of the wicken; they do not in fact offer succour and solace but remedies learned from the Devil and his dark arts.

Even Gollum is nervous on days like this as our power is diminished whilst theirs peaks, especially in day light savings times, ironically. The White Wabbit had a narrow escape - he thought that he was having a bath then noticed the vegetables being placed around him. Apparently someone replaced the spa with a cauldron. Mind you, no one really likes Hare in their soup.

Being the virgin that I am the witches ('nurses') want to boil my skin down and drink the concoction as it gives them the ability to fly; don't know why they want to do this as they don't speed around here unless they are chasing me to kick the shite out of me. They always have the back up of their Dyson in any case and since this has no bag there is no loss of suction; this is reputedly a good thing.

I asked Forensics for a script to help me:

And since its Friday the 13th I also need:

1. A wreath of Garlic
2. 10 sharpened stakes (need to be native wood)
3. 20 gallons of holy water with 15 pump water pistols.
4. Mirrors to create coffins to trap the souls of the undead after decapitation.
5. 3 Virgins (they’re for me)
6. A Case of Jack Daniels old no# 7.
7. Eight crates of Speight's.
8. The new “The Killers” CD.
9. Buffy the Vampire Slayer would come in handy.


This can all be scripted and faxed through to Unichem 09-238-7603.

The Pharmacist is a friend of the Day Walker and will understand and fill this request.

But so far the chemist reports that it has not arrived, I will have to have them deliver the items to my home.

I really should be taken seriously as the future of the WORLD depends on me stopping the flood of eeevvviiillllll.

I must leave as the 6000 year old dog is thirsty and since he is one of the only allies willing to consume whisky with me it is not good to keep him waiting - besides beer and whisky help me maintain the composure I need to battle Darkness on Friday's such as these.







The Grey Madness, Gollum, his 6000 year old dog and the 6ft White Wabbit.